Parental Conflict Can Be a Setup for Childhood Trauma

It’s not uncommon for me to hear the stories of children and teens who have stepped between their parents to keep one safe.

Those kids come adults may not realize it, but those are traumatic experiences.

As a parent whose child is in this situation, you may also not realize this has been traumatic for your child. The child may not be able to identify this as a traumatic experience. It doesn’t mean it isn’t.

As kids, they are frightened and may have difficulty settling or going to school worried about what may occur at home. Such a child may appear as anxious or depressed or as having ADHD.

As an adult there can be difficulty trusting one’s partner as well as being triggered by what may be minor events, worried about what may come next when there is nothing to come next.

Further, any depression or anxiety or difficulty concentrating may continue into adulthood affecting adult life.

Conflict in the home that escalates to the point of a child intervening is serious. It only need occur once to have a lasting impact.

Please, be mindful.

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I am Gary Direnfeld and I am a social worker. Check out all my services and then call me if you need help with a personal issue, mental health concern, child behavior or relationship, divorce or separation issue or even help growing your practice. I am available in person and by video conferencing.

Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW

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Gary Direnfeld is a social worker. Courts in Ontario, Canada, consider him an expert in social work, marital and family therapy, child development, parent-child relations and custody and access matters. Gary is the host of the TV reality show, Newlywed, Nearly Dead, former parenting columnist for the Hamilton Spectator and author of Marriage Rescue: Overcoming the ten deadly sins in failing relationships. Gary maintains a private practice in Georgina Ontario, providing a range of services for people in distress. He speaks at conferences and workshops throughout North America. He consults to mental health professionals as well as to mediators and collaborative law professionals about good practice as well as building their practice.