Rebuilding After an Affair?

That affair, it dismantles trust.

Trust cannot be restored by a promise.

Trust is an outcome of trustworthy behavior over time.

Trustworthiness is facilitated by transparency and accountability.

That means your partner must have full access to your phone, devices, and all means of communication.

It also means you check in frequently to advise of your whereabouts and you are where you say you are and can account for your time.

How long should this last? As long as your partner requires it, without any cajoling or guilting otherwise.

Truth is, these expectations are within the realm of normal for folks who get along and have satisfying relationships together.

Knowing our loved ones are concerned for our well-being, it is common to keep in touch and know of each others’ schedule.

When trust is in place, it’s less that we ever look into the communications of the other and more the knowledge that it just isn’t an issue.

The goal is to now get there when trust is broken.

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I am Gary Direnfeld and I am a social worker. Check out all my services and then call me if you need help with a personal issue, mental health concern, child behavior or relationship, divorce or separation issue or even help growing your practice. I am available in person and by video conferencing.

Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW

gary@yoursocialworker.com
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Gary Direnfeld is a social worker. Courts in Ontario, Canada, consider him an expert in social work, marital and family therapy, child development, parent-child relations and custody and access matters. Gary is the host of the TV reality show, Newlywed, Nearly Dead, former parenting columnist for the Hamilton Spectator and author of Marriage Rescue: Overcoming the ten deadly sins in failing relationships. Gary maintains a private practice in Georgina Ontario, providing a range of services for people in distress. He speaks at conferences and workshops throughout North America. He consults to mental health professionals as well as to mediators and collaborative law professionals about good practice as well as building their practice.